Cessation
©By Vijaya Sundaram
April 10, 2013
Ennui drips its grease
Onto my forehead,
Into my soul
Increases my need
To wash and rid myself
Of all that
Wearies me
Frighteningly, forever.
And I’d cleanse myself
Of all that degrades,
All that bores, denudes
Undoes, unravels
Unhinges and enchains
The joy of living.
And I’d be lost,
Before I dissolve.
But if I did,
I could cease to be.
The unexpected
And the grotesque
The lyrical, and the poignant,
The beautiful and the ugly,
The untested, the untried,
The sung and the unsung
All these would make
The air that I would breathe.
But now, ennui
Rules my days,
Presses its wet hand
Onto my greasy forehead.
Makes me want to scream,
Unbridled, unceasingly:
An open mouth
To an uncaring sky.
And if I do,
I would cease to be.
And the ears that would hear
Would be stopped by hearts
Too calloused with hurt
Too troubled for love
Too sad to care
For they have their own
Unendurable, unending,
Unspeakable ennui.
And my scream
Would last through all time
And unravel every cell in my being
Every atom of my existence
Until the very last thread
Would dangle in mid-air
Before the wind
Blew it away.
And as I unravel
I would cease to be.
~~~~~~~~The End~~~~~~~~