There’s a sweetness to children who care about other children, without feeling the need to be “cool.”
When I see a lack of such caring, I suspect it as being the result of too much exposure to popular culture, or too much knowledge of the world, or too little exposure to what simple affection, sans expectation, might look like. Lack of this simple connectedness is detrimental to our humanity as a whole — when one person behaves indifferently, and that person has some clout, indifference spreads. (Witness the increased lack of empathy in so many parts of our political and social culture.)
I have had, over the years, some teenaged students with special needs of one sort or another, or children who may have issues with learning because of emotional needs. Many times, there’s a vulnerability and a gentleness about those students that grabs my heart more than any other children I’ve taught.
Today, there was a young teenager who held the hand of another throughout the field trip we took to a museum. The other is on the spectrum, while the hand-holder is a kid with emotional and learning issues, although perfectly functional and able to communicate easily. They were happy. They sat on the bus together. They had a closeness that didn’t have anything to do with words. Both knew that the other cared. All artifice was stripped away. There was no issue of ambiguity. There was no sense of “You’re my friend today, because it’s convenient for me to have a friend.” There was a calmness, a surety, a sense of having a place in the world.
What’s happened to so many of the rest of us? Are we so heartless that gentleness and kindness take a backseat?
My heart was so moved by those two students, that I was close to tears. I couldn’t explain it.
They may have challenges in terms of academics, but they are always my true teachers.
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