Vijaya Sundaram

Poet, Musician, Teacher, and Amateur Visual Artist

Unframing
Unframing
(Inspired by the photographic work of Francesca Woodman)
©January 25th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
Frames dissolve and merge,
Frames emerge and fan out into outer space
Within, she finds solace,
But without, the vast beating of wings
Calls to her.
 
The stairs, the window, all that moves above,
All that lives and breathes below,
All the submerged, surging, urging of voices
Speaking through her own,
Images that flow like water,
Harden like rock, sift through her fingers like sand,
Lead to one question, and
The answer lies hidden,
A starfish in the sand, being
Slowly washed away from the shore
Out to an unknown sea.
 
A small tidal pool mirrors a white sky,
And below it, a hermit crab
Flexes and closes its claws,
Waiting to scuttle away
Away from prying eyes, waggling fingers,
I want to follow the crab,
I turn away, and let the waves lap at my feet.
Even a crab needs to be private.
The beating of wings nearby
Calls me – I turn.
When I look back, the crab is gone.
The water comes and goes, comes and goes.
Below, a seagull stands in the waves,
Looking at the sky.
Above, a seagull wheels and soars, white and shining,
A voice in the wind.
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Artery and Spine
Artery and Spine
©January 25th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
Sun-stream along my arteries
Flashes light in my ebbing blood.
Burst of sun-strength, burst of delight.
Watch where you stand! Look out! Flash-flood!
 
Cold-drips down my crackling spine
Freeze into stalactites.
Freeze into stalagmites.
Wander on through! Caverns of cold!
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Not A Tree
Not A Tree
©January 25th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
After you annihilate yourself,
What is left?
When your fondest notions:
Who you are
What you were
What you will be
Fall away like leaves from
A dying deciduous tree,
And all that’s left is
Trunk, branches, roots,
Still standing on dry, dying earth,
Do you now know,
Do you recognize your face?
Who are you now?
Tree analogies are comforting.
You are not a tree.
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‘Neath the Vine and Fig-Tree
‘Neath the Vine and Fig-Tree
©January 23rd, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
The fig-tree is dead
The vine seeks sunlight in vain.
The wind blows moon-drops.
 
Once, there were visions
But rain-curtains blind their light.
Curl up in your shell.
 
A shell collects life
Quietly calcifies in death
Capture the ocean.
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Cage of Flowers, Cage of Vines
Cage of Flowers, Cage of Vines
©January 22nd, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
Weave a cage, a pretty one
Weave it out of vines
Cover it with flower-buds
And needles from some pines.
 
Stick your pain inside that cage
Stick it with a pin
Cry about that mother killed
By coppers, and their kin.
 
They burst into her home one night
They came there for her son
When she fought back, protecting him,
They killed her with their guns.
 
They claimed it was in self-defense
Against a gun she’d aimed,
A pellet-gun with which she’d sought
To harm them, so they claimed.
 
They took the hapless son to jail
For drugs and minor crimes,
He’d watched his mother bleed to death,
Done in before her time.
 
There are no hearts that beat in them:
Those cops with icy veins.
For they can kill in cold blood, and
Emerge from it, unstained.
 
So, weave a cage, a pretty one
Weave it out of vines
Cover it with flower-buds,
And needles from some pines.
 
Stick your rage inside that cage,
Till you begin to bleed,
And then, break through with stronger will
To help all those in need.
 
The flowers will remind you of
Earth’s beauty all around.
The vines will bind you to all folks
And help you stand your ground.
 
Pine-needles will cushion the blow
For times when you might fall
The cage will disappear once you
Step out and heed the call.
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Windows and Gold-Dust Rooms
Windows and Gold-Dust Rooms
©January 21st, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
Little windows into bygone minds break
Little squares of old light in my own.
I slip through, tripping lightly
A quicksilver imp,
Curious, insatiable,
Sideways, slideways,
Just to look around.
 
People lived in these spaces,
Transparent, luminous, imagined.
People spoke of gladness and grief,
Moving like figures on a tapestry
As their makers wove tales, peopling
An already crowded and reality-cracked world.
None of them real, just fevered conjurations
Of older minds from other times.
 
A strange stasis holds me in thrall
As I stumble through these gold-dusted rooms
And gaze around, and take in their words.
 
Tomorrow, I shall move back
Sideways and slidewise, climbing back
Through one of those windows
Into my own, real, magic world.
I shall rearrange reality,
I shall trim the edges,
And carry water
To quench another thirst.
 
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Under the Sky, Under a Tree, Remembering …
Under the Sky, Under a Tree, Remembering …
©January 20th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
We walked through puddles, talking, laughing.
The sky was broken into salt mirrors on sidewalks,
And no birds sang.
We followed the dog who followed her nose,
And our tiredness fell away a little,
Like a dress falling off a shoulder,
Still on, but carelessly so.
 
Will I remember this day?
Will I remember this as I remember a day
Long, long ago, when I was thirteen, or fourteen,
And lay under a rich, emerald tree in Madras,
And drank the lemon light
Spilling like a stream of green-gold,
Slipping between leaves and falling on my eyelashes?
 
I remember that day.
There was nothing else to it:
Just a tree and light and me,
Absorbing it all, and growing, like Daphne,
Into a tree.
 
I would like this more than anything.
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Moth-Light
Moth-Light
©January 19th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
On late spring days, or early summer,
Moths stream in like dust-motes.
Born of moonlight and darkness,
They eat everything in sight.
 
I shudder in horror
And slam the door
In my haste to get in,
To keep them out.
For, while I like butterflies
(alas, the bias of the sighted),
I care little for their flat-winged
Dull, rapacious cousins.
 
Like thieves in the night,
They get in, anyway,
And beat themselves senseless
Against a cruel light-bulb.
 
I look up, and see them
Reaching blindly for light,
In mad, unrequited passion.
They must know they’ll die.
Surely, they must!
 
I look up, and see them
Plunging lustfully into light,
And feel a pang of recognition.
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In the Cradle

In the Cradle
©January 18th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram

In a make-believe world
You find solace and shelter,
Far from inexorable, implacable,
Undeniable train-track reality.

To live several lives at once,
To carry yourself gently, kindly,
Like a cup of water, for miles and miles
Across an arid wasteland,
Across a wild, dense rainforest,
Across mountains and valleys,
Fording rivers in full flood –

And to find on this side a life to treasure,
And on that side, a life to deplore,
And to weave music and words, deeds and thoughts
In this world of make-believe –
In these things, you find comfort.

Ugliness abounds like weeds among us.
Men misread and mistreat women, who misread them.
Hatefulness blooms like a disease,
Erupting in pustules of violence,
Till living makes no sense,
No sense at all.

But look! There blooms a lake of lotuses,
And here, a play written in another century
By a disillusioned playwright lost in despair,
And here, a dog playing in the snow with your child,
And elsewhere, songs about love and heartbreak
In the comfort of golden surroundings,
And the love of a steadfast partner.

Yes, these help.
Herein lies comfort, in which I shall
Wrap myself, like a child in a blanket
Cradled in warmth,
While winter covers a bloody world,
And I dream about dying and being born anew.
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Snow-Fort
Snow-Fort
©January 17th, 2018
By Vijaya Sundaram
 
I am silent now.
Still my speech bursts forth from me
Steaming into space.
 
Breath escapes, rising
Wraith-like into the cold air,
Gets pulled into shreds.
 
Snow comes down like breath.
Like words encased in woollens,
Snow falls, muffled, soft.
 
With snowfall comes cold.
With the cold arrives numbness.
With numbness comes death.
 
I’ll build a snow-fort
And in it, I’ll start a fire
Keeping wolves at bay.
 
If my snow-fort melts
I’ll rebuild it, pack it tight,
Word by frigid word.
 
And when morning comes
And I’m stretched out cold and still
Leave me be, leave me.
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